Monday, November 07, 2005

Looks Like You Lost Your Best Friend

So I did.

In fact I lost nearly all of my friends.

For the past 5 or 6 years I have been a member of an online community. A huge group of women who were brought together by homeschooling but stayed together for friendship and support.

They were my friends.

We shared everything that we lived. We discussed what we were having for dinner and what our deepest fears were...we talked about our marriages, or lack there of. We talked about our children, our pets, our pasts, our dreams and hopes. We supported one another during great trials and tribulations. We argued, discussed, debated and taught...all the while we attempted to always respect each other as a sister in Christ.

They were my only supprt during the days I was learning of the depths of my boys' dissorders.

Then one among them decided that I had lied. I didn't. I try to always tell the truth, even to my own loss...but she was certain. She had friends who believed her and their friends believed them. Soon even people who knew me well questioned my honesty and integrity.

One day I arrived at the "community" to discover dozens of women discussing my integrity. This was gossip or course...and slander, but no one pointed that out.

2 months later it still breaks my heart to think of the loss and the lies. Although, one woman later contacted me privately and apologized. Still, there will never be a place among them for me, again.

How deep the hurt of the betrayal of a friend.

1 comment:

Leni said...

I'm glad someone apologized, but I bet I know with all certainty who it was not! ;o)

Well, if nothing else, friend, I'm glad we were both there long enough to get to know each other. I count my life richer for having you in it.

And I agree, losing a close friend cuts deeper than I could have imagined. To know that they chose to walk away, to deem you's horrible.

And by the way, they are wrong. (Just in case you were wondering!)