Monday, May 03, 2010

Visits seven & eight

Visit seven happened last week and I was sick. Middle-One did pretty well though. It was probably the best visit.

Visit eight was the worst one.

Middle wasn't on his meds for either visit so we can't (won't) attribute any behavior to medication (or the lack of it).

The visit began on Thursday evening. Mr. T took Ebear to football practice and had some errands to run. When Mr. T arrived at the foster home Middle was not even there. He was informed that he could find Middle-One at the neighborhood playground. Mr. T had to go find our son and bring him back to the foster home to pick up his things. They then went to join the team at Burger King. Mr. T said that Middle handled it well. A little quirky, but not too obvious.

Friday morning; we got up and began getting ready to go to our four hour therapy appointment (+ 2 hours drive time). We packed a lunch and put dinner in the crock pot. The session has a post of it's own so I won't elaborate here. Middle and Bright-Eyes were both ready to explode. they were at each other and extremely impulsive and hyper. Things were building up. There was a lot of arguing. Middle was beginning to argue with anything we said... and a couple of times it didn't even make sense. And Bright-Eyes was pushing Middle's buttons and setting up a Sad-Mad pattern at every turn.

Saturday; We were at home all day due to incoming storms. The boys didn't have much chance to play outside but Mr. T did take them to a local church to ride their bikes and play basketball. Just like the approaching storms, Middle was building in instability. We were seeing a decrease in impulse control, a lack of ability to take responsibility, blaming others, arguing, defending... He was just terribly unpleasant!!! Mr. T grilled for our dining pleasure. Middle was eating everything and having trouble letting us have food left over. That evening, we all sat down to watch Sherlock Holmes. About halfway through Middle decided to ... pass gas, as is his habit. At first Bright-Eyes and I moved from the couch... and Middle laid down taking the whole couch. Having no where to sit I said that Middle needed to be the one to move because we didn't do it. We were all being good natured and had Middle-One move to a chair. Then he began to get hostile. He didn't want to sit in the chair. Claimed he couldn't see from the chair. (same distance as the couch from the TV). We told him that he needed to sit down and be quiet. Then he grumbled about not being able to see and sat down on the floor (same distance). Well, besides the attitude, Ebear was sitting on the floor and looking at us in a way that clearly said he did not want to share the floor. (also the dogs are down there and there is an issue with the dogs and Middle) We told Middle to sit in the chair and it was at that point that he sunk into total meltdown.

The meltdown lasted about 30 minutes. Could have been worse. He whined and wailed and refused to do what we said. Refused to listen or discuss. Would not process anything. Kept telling us that we were mean and were always mean to him. *sigh*. He got sent to bed and that increased the fury. Finally I went and got him and sat him down at the table in the dining room. I worked out a LONG chain-analysis with him. He did eventually admit to his responsibility in the event. Then he apologized (under duress ;o) ) and went to bed. The rest of us recovered from the PTS flashbacks we were having and watched the end of the movie.

Sunday; We did not go to church. Mr. T, Ebear and Bright-Eyes had colds and sore throats. We remained at home. I began getting sick (again!). Middle-One was very hyper and annoying. We just could not even talk to him without an argument. Then he would argue about whether he was arguing or not. We were all dumbstruck by the relentless behavior.

Monday; We had an appointment for Middle to be seen by his new p-doc. We had to take him so we kept him home and planned to take him and then drop him at school so he could ride the bus to his foster home. Mr. T reported that in the appointment Middle tried to argue and disagree with absolutely everything he told the Dr. He said it was ridiculous. The Dr. prescribed the meds and Mr. T had them filled. Half to the school and half to us!

At home, Ebear, Bright-Eyes and I all relaxed and caught our breath.

Strangely it doesn't sound so bad in writing, but it was BAD!!!


FosterAbba said...

I've noticed the same thing about some of Danielle's explosions. When they are happening, they are absolutely horrible. When I write what happened and then re-read what I wrote, it doesn't seem nearly as dreadful.

It's hard to convey the emotional content of her behavior, especially when she's doing her best to get on my absolute last nerve.

So I understand exactly what you mean when you say, "Strangely it doesn't sound so bad in writing, but it was BAD!!!"

Tammy said...

FosterAbba, Thank you. It's so nice to be understood. :o)